the other day i was trying to impress this new group at a gathering and accidentally told a long story about how i once mistook a pantomime for real acting, but it got so awkward when i realized nobody was even laughing and they thought i was serious about it being a life lesson or something, ugh, just kill me now.
so i literally just sat in my apartment for weeks watching everyone post their achievements and fun nights out, while i am stuck here with this elevator broken and honestly my only entertainment is watching dust gather on the windowsill.
it is wild how i can feel surrounded by people all day but still not want to talk to anyone, just sitting there staring at the same blank wall as if waiting for some kind of sign that it is okay to be lonely like this, no texts coming through or anything that says i matter to anyone.
it is wild how i can feel surrounded by people all day but still not want to talk to anyone, just sitting there staring at the same blank wall as if waiting for some kind of sign that it is okay to be lonely like this, no texts coming through or anything that says i matter to anyone.
checked my bank account and saw that i had just enough for groceries but definitely not for that new video game i've been wanting. feel like i just keep watching my plans slip away, like, what's the point of even wanting stuff when i know i cannot afford it.