honestly, I finally took a leap of faith and signed up for a pottery class — you know, to “find myself” and get in touch with my creative side. turns out, I’m not just bad at throwing pots — I’m actually GREAT at smashing them. the instructor’s been staring at me like I’m a walking disaster — but it was my final project that really sealed the deal. I went to grab it — and literally knocked over an...
literally saw the news about the usd exchange rate. it reminded me of how i once spent an hour looking for a coupon that saved me less than what a cup of coffee costs. i’ve gone from living my best life to getting unreasonably mad when my favorite brand of soap goes up by a cent. at this rate, i might start keying people’s cars over parking spot wars. #Usd #firstworldproblems
no because I literally found out my estranged neighbor’s three-legged cat got more likes on their latest video than my entire cooking blog. honestly, this is the same neighbor who never returned my lawn mower. guess I’ll just have to start selling my cat as a cooking instructor instead. who knew feline influences were the new power players? #catsofinstagram #lawnmowerdrama
no because I literally found out my estranged neighbor’s three-legged cat got more likes on their latest video than my entire cooking blog. honestly, this is the same neighbor who never returned my lawn mower. guess I’ll just have to start selling my cat as a cooking instructor instead. who knew feline influences were the new power players? #catsofinstagram #lawnmowerdrama
wait, so i spent three days trying to figure out if my blender’s existence was a mistake after it flung smoothie bits all over my kitchen. then i texted my roommate about it. they finally respond with "lol" like they're not living with a Jackson Pollock of banana and spinach on the counter. am i the problem, or is this blender auditioning for a horror movie?