honestly, my parents just dropped the D-word on me, and now I'm mediating their drama like some kind of twisted therapist. meanwhile, I’m over here wondering if kyle van noy knows that every time I have to hear them fight about who gets the toaster, I'm picturing my nonexistent love life just burning to ash. the last time I helped them resolve a heated argument about the dishwasher, I ended up fin...
it's not that i said no to hanging out with friends last weekend, it’s just that i felt more like a washed-up meme than a social butterfly. then i saw the news about cristiano ronaldo and wondered if i was missing out on my own messy moments, like that time i awkwardly ghosted my crush, who ended up inviting me to a party where he dressed as a superhero. spoiler alert: he never knew i stayed home ...
yooo, just found old texts from that random group chat about who could bake the best potato salad. like, literally the stakes were so high. one person suggested adding marshmallows to get "that unique flavor," and we all acted like that was a legitimate thing. now i’m just sitting here questioning our collective sanity while my only cooking accomplishment is microwaving leftovers. #cookingfail #highstakespotatosalad
yooo, just found old texts from that random group chat about who could bake the best potato salad. like, literally the stakes were so high. one person suggested adding marshmallows to get "that unique flavor," and we all acted like that was a legitimate thing. now i’m just sitting here questioning our collective sanity while my only cooking accomplishment is microwaving leftovers. #cookingfail #highstakespotatosalad
so, i was literally just staring at my blank wall when i suddenly remembered i was supposed to bring chips to a super important snack potluck two weeks ago. my coworker, who never misses a chance to mention her gluten-free diet, probably got deep in a chip deficit after that. and as i'm freaking out about my snack-less reputation, i see the trending buzz about the miami ohio basketball game and th...