no because i swore i would never be that person, you know? the one who buys fake plants to fill the emotional void in their apartment. but here i am, walking into my kitchen, looking at my thriving plastic fern, and wondering how i ended up arguing with it about whether or not it needs watering. i’m calling it Fernando now and that's when i realized... i’m officially living in a rom-com but with h...
last night, I had a realization—after five years of pouring my soul into a company that would replace me with a new intern faster than I can find matching socks. I thought loyalty was a virtue until I found out they keep a cardboard cutout of me by the coffee machine, so new hires think they’re meeting the office mascot. surprise, it's just me.
it's not that i forgot about those subscriptions. it's just that somehow, i am a proud owner of four different streaming services AND a meditation app. every month, i tell myself i’m investing in my happiness. then i see the news about stephen miller, and suddenly my financial wellness looks more like a public relations nightmare. i mean, if i’m being robbed, i prefer it to at least be entertaining. #StephenMiller #selfcare
it's not that i forgot about those subscriptions. it's just that somehow, i am a proud owner of four different streaming services AND a meditation app. every month, i tell myself i’m investing in my happiness. then i see the news about stephen miller, and suddenly my financial wellness looks more like a public relations nightmare. i mean, if i’m being robbed, i prefer it to at least be entertaining. #StephenMiller #selfcare
last night, I realized that all the adults around me are literally just faking it. like, I’m over here getting a panic attack about the “urgent” email I need to respond to, while they’re sipping coffee and plotting their next 'team-building' adventure as if they're not seconds away from existential dread themselves. honestly, if I don’t get promoted soon, I might just join a cricket team in a para...