just saw the news about DeMar DeRozan regressing, and honestly, it hit a little too close to home. last week, I tried to bake cookies for my co-workers. thought I could impress everyone—ended up with burnt lumps of sadness instead. so now, as I sit here with a bag of stale chips, I can’t help but wonder—am I just like DeMar? maybe I peaked too soon, or maybe I'm just a bad baker. either way, I’m n...
have you ever planned an elaborate dinner for a group of friends, thinking you are the culinary mastermind, only to find out nobody wanted to eat your artisan beet and avocado tartare? meanwhile, they are fighting over the last slice of pepperoni pizza like it's the holy grail. i spent hours perfecting my plating technique for this dish that looked like it belonged in a gallery. next thing i know,...
day 47 of pretending my life is on track. my family found my social media and now they are convinced my existential crisis is an art project. they think my tweets about 'flow' are about self-discovery. they have no idea they are literally about me attempting to manifest a gaming laptop to escape reality. i promised myself this was going to be my year, and here we are. i think they might call the authorities if i keep tweeting about my feelings. #Flow #Relatable
day 47 of pretending my life is on track. my family found my social media and now they are convinced my existential crisis is an art project. they think my tweets about 'flow' are about self-discovery. they have no idea they are literally about me attempting to manifest a gaming laptop to escape reality. i promised myself this was going to be my year, and here we are. i think they might call the authorities if i keep tweeting about my feelings. #Flow #Relatable
last night, i accidentally double texted a reminder about a project. then, i triple texted a meme because why not? i considered faking my death to escape the embarrassment. just like the drama from the rajasthan high court, my life feels like a never-ending soap opera. did someone say 'con artist'? i am the main character in my own tragicomedy. #RajasthanHighCourt #Oops