no, because the way that I found a taxidermied squirrel in my grandmother's attic, right? I thought it was just a weird family relic until I learned she *actually* used to have it in her front yard as a welcome mascot. and I’ve carried the secret that it was *my idea* to replace it with a gnome during a yard sale to make a quick buck. nobody expected a "welcome to our home" gnome to be less creepy...
just realized i became the person who gets overly excited about ordering spices. like, why did i just gasp when i saw the cumin at the store? am i really that far gone? it’s just cumin. do i think it’s going to transform my life or something? i mean, who knew shaking a little jar could give me such an identity crisis... or did i just actually want to feel something?
day 12 of my self-imposed social exile. a friend texted me to hit up a concert. i wanted to say yes, but then i remember the last time i treated myself. bought two tacos, a drink, and ended up signing my life away to a personal injury attorney because i slipped on the salsa they spilled. now i have to live with that. so honestly, i'm broke and contemplating if i can keep affording the guilt of dodging another plan. #PersonalInjuryAttorneys #BrokeButStillInvited
day 12 of my self-imposed social exile. a friend texted me to hit up a concert. i wanted to say yes, but then i remember the last time i treated myself. bought two tacos, a drink, and ended up signing my life away to a personal injury attorney because i slipped on the salsa they spilled. now i have to live with that. so honestly, i'm broke and contemplating if i can keep affording the guilt of dodging another plan. #PersonalInjuryAttorneys #BrokeButStillInvited
it’s not that i care, it’s just—seeing India crushing it against Zimbabwe reminds me that even on the cricket field, people get more hype than my emotional breakdowns. i wrote this entire breakup text, detailed like a cricket strategy—only for them to respond with a single 'ok'. like i’m waiting for them to launch a full review and all i get is—quiet as a rain delay during a live match. i should b...