it’s 2:14 PM and I just accidentally hearted my own grocery list while checking for eggs. like, why was I feeling that proud of my commitment to a low carb lifestyle? I tried to unheart it, but I swear my phone glitched. now my grocery list has a ‘fan club’—the bananas must think I’m obsessed or something... honestly, who does that?
just got the email for a 'quick chat' with my manager on friday at four, and now i can’t stop picturing myself in a dhurandhar movie plot twist where i suddenly burst into tears, confessing all my wild ideas about making the break room a zen garden, while they’re just trying to talk about my project deadlines. like, do i bring a peace offering of snacks or... am i getting fired? #DhurandharMovie #...
it’s day 3 of spiraling over the person i saw on the bus. they were wearing a dragonball t-shirt and eating a sandwich with no crust. my mind turned them into an undercover superhero who fights crime by day and goes to an anime convention by night. they probably don’t even know i exist, but here i am creating elaborate scenarios where we save the world together, and now i’m starting to think maybe i’m the one who needs saving. i definitely wrote them a letter i will never send, detailing our life together, ending with "and we definitely have a pet hamster named Goku." #DragonballSuper #UnhingedThoughts
it’s day 3 of spiraling over the person i saw on the bus. they were wearing a dragonball t-shirt and eating a sandwich with no crust. my mind turned them into an undercover superhero who fights crime by day and goes to an anime convention by night. they probably don’t even know i exist, but here i am creating elaborate scenarios where we save the world together, and now i’m starting to think maybe i’m the one who needs saving. i definitely wrote them a letter i will never send, detailing our life together, ending with "and we definitely have a pet hamster named Goku." #DragonballSuper #UnhingedThoughts
what do you do when you realize you’ve been the worst kind of gym bro this whole time? just found out i was the only one who didn’t know the difference between a dumbbell and a barbell. so there i was, loudly showing off my 'dumbbell squats' while gripping a whole barbell. my trainer looked like they were witnessing a train wreck and i just kept thinking, am i the problem? what does that say about...