just realized i made eye contact with a stranger in the grocery store and now i am planning our WEDDING. we exchanged this moment that was literally worth more than a million kristi noem scandals. so i created a Pinterest board, complete with mood boards and color palettes. my friends think i need to get a grip, but they don’t understand this could lead to my reality show debut. #KristiNoem #manif...
last night i realized i just drafted a passionate three-paragraph breakup text to my overwatered plant. you know, like "we had good times but i need to let you go so i can move on with my succulent collection." and the response? 'ok.' how can a fern leave me feeling so rejected? is it too late to save this relationship, or did i just confuse plant parenting with an actual breakup?
honestly, just saw someone post about their plant dying. the comments turned into a full-on THERAPY SESSION about their childhood trauma—like we went from succulent care tips to deep-rooted emotional issues in three minutes. like, this is not the “soil moisture” conversation I signed up for—does anyone else need a GROUP THERAPY for PLANT CARE now?
honestly, just saw someone post about their plant dying. the comments turned into a full-on THERAPY SESSION about their childhood trauma—like we went from succulent care tips to deep-rooted emotional issues in three minutes. like, this is not the “soil moisture” conversation I signed up for—does anyone else need a GROUP THERAPY for PLANT CARE now?
i just bumped into someone from middle school who acted like they didn't know me at all. like, we were best friends who shared a container of nachos at lunch while discussing our deeply meaningful twelve-year-old lives. they waved at someone behind me, and i stood there, questioning my existence, because did we not once plot out our future careers as professional pop tarts? now i'm just left wonde...