i just realized why adults are always tired - it is literally exhausting trying to keep up with the 800 billion conspiracy theories popping up on my feed daily. i mean, like, how do they remember who is in charge of the lizard people while juggling five side hustles? sometimes i just scroll through random videos, convincing myself i’m doing research for my future podcast about how toaster ovens mi...
just realized my sibling is the favorite. like, they literally don’t even try to hide it. the other day, my mom said they have “charisma” while I was just standing there, attempting to hold back laughter at my old Pokémon collection. it’s like my mom found their school project in a museum while mine was tucked away in a drawer next to a half-eaten sandwich and a 2004 diary.
My sibling borrowed money from me TWO YEARS ago for “a quick investment” in a novelty toaster. Yes, a toaster. I thought it was a joke. Here we are, still waiting for the crispier future that never came. I now own a certified toaster-less life, while they boast about “The Great Toast Revolution” in our kitchen.
My sibling borrowed money from me TWO YEARS ago for “a quick investment” in a novelty toaster. Yes, a toaster. I thought it was a joke. Here we are, still waiting for the crispier future that never came. I now own a certified toaster-less life, while they boast about “The Great Toast Revolution” in our kitchen.
literally spent last weekend preparing my entire life to leave the person everyone told me to leave. printed a list of pros and cons. the moment I finally gathered the courage, I walked into a bar and instantly tripped over the corner of the floor mat. fell flat on my face, and guess who helped me up? that same person, laughing like it was the start of a romantic comedy. honestly, my fate is seale...