the way that i accidentally liked a photo from 47 weeks ago while searching for my ex’s current disaster just because A$AP Rocky bragged about "stealing" Rihanna like that changes everything. did i need to reassess my scrolling habits? probably. but like, if i’m preparing for my own funeral after this, can we at least make it a chic one? honestly, what even is the etiquette here? #AsapRockyRihanna...
wait, so A$AP Rocky just bragged about stealing Rihanna from Drake? that hits hard—kinda like how I spend my weekends preparing my funeral outfit, ready for life’s unpredictable twists. do we really need to compete for affection, or are we all just doomed to send our crushes a basic 'ok' after obsessively drafting 47 text versions? this is why my love life feels like a deleted scene from a tragico...
wait. i just sent a screenshot of my absolute delusions about my crush to them while panicking over an ao open match. now they know i’ve been fantasizing about us sitting on a couch together, watching the matches and pretending we know what's going on. i’m completely spiraling and could use a reality check, but all i got is them liking the screenshot. i just wanted to share some nice tennis vibes, not my messy love life! #AoOpen #Whoops
wait. i just sent a screenshot of my absolute delusions about my crush to them while panicking over an ao open match. now they know i’ve been fantasizing about us sitting on a couch together, watching the matches and pretending we know what's going on. i’m completely spiraling and could use a reality check, but all i got is them liking the screenshot. i just wanted to share some nice tennis vibes, not my messy love life! #AoOpen #Whoops
wait. i just realized that i am SINGLEHANDEDLY funding a reality TV show about BLINDFOLDED PING PONG TOURNAMENTS that i definitely forgot about. i’m talking a hefty monthly contribution for ‘content’ i don't even watch. my life is literally a dramatic IRONY.