not gonna lie, i just spent an hour debating if i should send a friend request to someone who sells antique spoons online. like, why am i contemplating manifesting a life where they notice me because of my *dedication to flatware*? do i think i could join them on a treasure hunt for the world's rarest ladle? it's truly unhinged how deeply i researched their spoon collection. does anyone else lowke...
not gonna lie, I spent three months curating a fruit fly farm for "science." you know, trusting the process, letting nature take its course. turns out the process has a darker sense of humor. now my kitchen is a shrine to buzzing regrets. I can’t eat an apple without picturing my ex-colony launching an uprising against me.
it's not that I’m devastated, it's just—I literally watched my friends pick sides over a debate about what sandwich is the best, and I ended up in the peanut butter and jelly corner, surrounded by people I don’t even like, while my actual best friend was living their best life in the ham and cheese camp. like, how do I even explain this at the next dinner? "oh, I am a proud member of the jelly brigade, but we are definitely not spreading any love today."
it's not that I’m devastated, it's just—I literally watched my friends pick sides over a debate about what sandwich is the best, and I ended up in the peanut butter and jelly corner, surrounded by people I don’t even like, while my actual best friend was living their best life in the ham and cheese camp. like, how do I even explain this at the next dinner? "oh, I am a proud member of the jelly brigade, but we are definitely not spreading any love today."
yooo, just realized my whole life is like that moment in #MissScarlet when everything looks normal but chaos is just around the corner. i thought my paycheck was loyal, a faithful companion who wouldn't betray me, but it’s showing up three days late. meanwhile, i just committed to that 'hot girl' status by ordering my first pair of silk pajamas online. now i’m wondering if i should be fashionable ...