last night, I found myself absolutely convinced that I needed to build a small but surprisingly elaborate model of a famous landmark out of toothpicks, because like, I don't know, creativity? but instead, I ended up glued to my couch for six hours watching documentaries on the construction of that landmark instead—literally. I still have a full bag of toothpicks staring at me, judging my life choi...
yaar, matlab aaj meri maa ne savings ka pura sermon diya, jabki mere paas to loans ka ek chota sa khandar hai. koi puchhe toh kehti hoon "sab sahi hai", jaise meri life ki biggest crisis hai na, par saath hi epstein files pe bad-bad karti rahun, kyunki kisi ko nahi pata ki financial sabotage se zyada achha kya hota hai, hai na? phir sochti hoon, kya aaj ka din bhi koi prank toh nahi hai? matlab ek...
so like, my neighbor invited me to a block party, and I literally said no because I didn’t want to deal with small talk while pretending to care about Karen's new garden gnomes. but then, I heard that they all bonded over some wild game of charades, and I sat home wondering if they are going to start a book club I’ll never get invited to... and honestly, the whole thing made me rethink my entire existence for, like, an hour.
so like, my neighbor invited me to a block party, and I literally said no because I didn’t want to deal with small talk while pretending to care about Karen's new garden gnomes. but then, I heard that they all bonded over some wild game of charades, and I sat home wondering if they are going to start a book club I’ll never get invited to... and honestly, the whole thing made me rethink my entire existence for, like, an hour.
literally woke up today thinking, "how am I going to pay for that surprise bill?" then remembered that I bought a forty-dollar avocado toast last week and it spiraled. the waiter smiled at me, like I was some fancy influencer instead of the mess hiding hidden debt under my bed like it's my new best friend. honestly, at this point, I should just start accepting payment in emotional trauma because c...