last night, i had a full meltdown over that vahe gregorian news. sat in front of my computer crying because my dog started barking during my favorite cooking stream, and i swear it’s the same chaos i feel when football debates go nuclear. i should probably grow up, but i couldn't help but wonder if my dog is secretly part of a fanbase against me, living for the chaos of my kitchen disasters. who n...
last night, I stumbled upon my roommate's secret Instagram account dedicated to—wait for it—dinosaur fashion. like, I didn't know there were that many stylish outfits for T-rexes. now I can't unsee the dinosaur models strutting in crop tops and sparkly high heels. I might be more offended than impressed, but honestly...who knew Jurassic Couture was a thing? #DinoDrama #FashionForward
it's not that i don't recognize that person in the old photos, it's just that they seem way too comfortable in skinny jeans and floral shirts. like, where did the confidence come from? meanwhile, i’m over here apologizing to my furniture for bumping into it while sporting pajamas three sizes too big. maybe i should've just thanked the universe for allowing me to evolve from a human disco ball into a cozy potato. honestly, i might just be the growth that lost its spark!
it's not that i don't recognize that person in the old photos, it's just that they seem way too comfortable in skinny jeans and floral shirts. like, where did the confidence come from? meanwhile, i’m over here apologizing to my furniture for bumping into it while sporting pajamas three sizes too big. maybe i should've just thanked the universe for allowing me to evolve from a human disco ball into a cozy potato. honestly, i might just be the growth that lost its spark!
wait—so there I was, at the laundromat, in my mismatched pajamas, shaking my head at an episode of an old cooking show—when I caught a whiff of my ex's signature cologne wafting in. I turned to see him flirting with my friend over the folding tables while I was busy trying to figure out how to get that stubborn coffee stain out of my favorite hoodie—too bad my real drama was that I hadn't washed i...