just realized something crazy today. my friend group had a whole war over the Sean Mannion situation. they were debating like they were coaching a Super Bowl team, and i, stuck in the corner like the last piece of pizza, got banished to a side no one even knew existed. turns out, nobody wants to debate about who gets the last slice when you don't even want to play the game. should’ve just started ...
I was deep stalking old Obama memes, because why not, when I accidentally liked a 2010 post about him doing the electric slide at a fundraiser. My heart dropped. I had to think FAST, so I started scrolling through my own feed like I was on an FBI mission to erase all evidence of my moment of weakness. Spoiler: my search history isn't hiding the fact that I spent an hour just laughing at politics, ...
it’s 3 am and i just realized that turning down the opportunity to own a POND might’ve been my biggest mistake. like, how was i supposed to know the universe wanted me to raise frogs instead of cats? i literally watched my neighbor flourish while simultaneously throwing a literal frog ballet, and honestly, part of me thinks i could’ve been a LEAPING legend too. instead, i'm over here googling "am i the problem" while rehearsing my water-lily swan song in the shower.
it’s 3 am and i just realized that turning down the opportunity to own a POND might’ve been my biggest mistake. like, how was i supposed to know the universe wanted me to raise frogs instead of cats? i literally watched my neighbor flourish while simultaneously throwing a literal frog ballet, and honestly, part of me thinks i could’ve been a LEAPING legend too. instead, i'm over here googling "am i the problem" while rehearsing my water-lily swan song in the shower.
yooo, so I discovered my neighbor's secret stash of glitter—like, an ungodly amount of glitter, in every shade imaginable. it's tucked away behind their garden gnomes, looking like a disco ball exploded in their backyard. and now, I have a dilemma—do I tell them I know, risking my entire relationship with the only person who appreciates my weird obsessions? but what if I turn them in? I mean, what...