it's 2:22 PM and the smell of pickled herring just took over the break room... like, who thought that was a good idea? reminds me of those summers at grandma's when she'd insist on making "special" lunches for everyone while we secretly prayed for pizza rolls instead. honestly, I kinda miss the chaos of the ‘90s when food fights seemed like the biggest risk...
so there I am at the family dinner, right, and my mom hits me with the classic "why are you still single?" as if my life's some rom-com and i'm the main character on pause. meanwhile, my 12-year-old cousin is deep-diving into this new game 'avatar frontiers of pandora' and explaining how he feels like the na'vi embody his spirit animal which like honestly... big mood. it’s wild, really, I feel mor...
yo so I just discovered the 2nd best vending machine in the entire gym, right by the cardio section? it's literally got every flavor of Gatorade except the blue one, like, what even is that?! ngl I'm already planning my post-workout feast and then my landlord drops the bomb on the rent and I’m just here like, can a guy enjoy a spicy Cheeto smoothie in peace?
yo so I just discovered the 2nd best vending machine in the entire gym, right by the cardio section? it's literally got every flavor of Gatorade except the blue one, like, what even is that?! ngl I'm already planning my post-workout feast and then my landlord drops the bomb on the rent and I’m just here like, can a guy enjoy a spicy Cheeto smoothie in peace?
so i just checked my bank account and i’m pretty sure i’ve funded the entire taco truck industry this month alone. $76.43 on tacos from El Rey because apparently i think “it’s Taco Tuesday” every day?? also why do they not give you a spoon for the extra guac? like wth am i supposed to do, use my fingers?? it’s like i'm committed to this weird taco cult and now im regretting life choices and wonder...