yooo, just got the news about national voters day, and like, bruh, my coworker just forwarded my embarrassing hot takes about the company lunch menu to the entire team. now everyone knows my preference for extra pickles is basically a life philosophy. sitting here wondering if the president will honor me with a medal for my critical insights. so glad nobody knows i seriously debated running away t...
the way i literally had my coworker see my search history that included "taurus horoscope today" right next to "how to convince a landlord to let me keep my pet rock" and we just looked at each other like nothing happened is honestly beyond me. now i’m left to wonder if they think i’m manifesting new hobbies or just spiraling out of control, but like... what do i even say next? #TaurusHoroscopeTod...
its not that i’m scared about my manager’s 'quick chat' at four on Friday. it’s just that i found out through a work gossip that he’s got the same first name as Bruce Springsteen. suddenly, i’m sweating like i’m about to get pulled over by the police, praying he won’t ask about the project i “over-promised” on. who knew a name could set off that kind of panic? now, should i bring up Bruce’s stance on ICE or will that just make things weirder? #BruceSpringsteen #lifeanxiety
its not that i’m scared about my manager’s 'quick chat' at four on Friday. it’s just that i found out through a work gossip that he’s got the same first name as Bruce Springsteen. suddenly, i’m sweating like i’m about to get pulled over by the police, praying he won’t ask about the project i “over-promised” on. who knew a name could set off that kind of panic? now, should i bring up Bruce’s stance on ICE or will that just make things weirder? #BruceSpringsteen #lifeanxiety
its not that i trusted him, its just that i was prepared to send him my favorite granola bar recipe - when i found out he used my second chance to text my neighbor instead. they’re now sharing yoga classes while i’m left practicing deep breathing over his empty texts. honestly, how is this like the Iva Jovic comeback story? she’s out there STRONGER while i’m over here wondering if my next chapter ...