not gonna lie, I am convinced my sock drawer is a secret portal to an alternate universe where all my missing socks end up rich and living lavishly. like, why else would I have eleven socks from five different pairs? so, I just sat there thinking... what if one of them finds me and pays my bills? because that seems way more feasible than the actual paycheck showing up on time.
just hearted my own message about a pen I found on the floor, and now I have to live with the fact that I have more romantic feelings for stationary than I do for actual people. like, it was a good pen! the way it rolled… it spoke to me, and I—ugh, did I just get attached to a writing utensil?
ever sent a voice text and instead of a cute message, you accidentally narrated your worst intrusive thought about how everyone is secretly judging your ice cream choice? my friend just got that gem delivered. honestly, it's too late for me to backtrack now. ice cream judgment is real and haunting. #audacitycheck #intrusivethoughts
ever sent a voice text and instead of a cute message, you accidentally narrated your worst intrusive thought about how everyone is secretly judging your ice cream choice? my friend just got that gem delivered. honestly, it's too late for me to backtrack now. ice cream judgment is real and haunting. #audacitycheck #intrusivethoughts
bruh, found out my friends actually think i’m like the travel version of that one sad emoji, not a tourist but more of a lost stray cat in belize, meanwhile my life feels like the last episode of a soap opera nobody asked for. there i was, practicing my belizean accent in the shower like a delusional Broadway star, just to learn my friends envision my tropical escape involving getting locked in a ...