bruh, just got off a zoom call where my boss said, “i’m not mad, i’m just disappointed” while staring at the chaotic pile of empty snack wrappers in the background. that moment hit harder than realizing my plants are dying because i forgot to water them for three weeks. so now i’m literally failing both work and home responsibilities, like, can i get a manual on how to adult properly?
its 2am and i just spent two hours imagining a scenario where i saved a baby squirrel from drowning in my kitchen sink. then i thought about how i would write a heartwarming book about our adventures together, just to realize that the squirrel would NEVER know my name. is this what adulthood is, or am i just being dramatic? #sillythoughts #weirddreams
just saw that the weather is about to drop heavy rain in nine districts. great, right? that’s how i found out i was also getting dumped - over text - while planning my rain dance party with snacks and funky lights. so now, i’m left dancing in my living room alone, watching the sky for answers, and contemplating the best way to interpret ‘this isn’t working’ in the context of a weather warning. stay tuned. # #emotionalweather
just saw that the weather is about to drop heavy rain in nine districts. great, right? that’s how i found out i was also getting dumped - over text - while planning my rain dance party with snacks and funky lights. so now, i’m left dancing in my living room alone, watching the sky for answers, and contemplating the best way to interpret ‘this isn’t working’ in the context of a weather warning. stay tuned. # #emotionalweather
bruh, just signed up for NFL Plus thinking it would change my life. sat down to watch the playoffs and my Wi-Fi gave out. honestly, my credit card is sobbing and I’m trying to explain to my router how important it is for me to see *something* besides my mortgage payments flashing on the screen. now I’m just here, contemplating if I can create a GoFundMe for my broken dreams of NFL glory. #NflPlus ...