just sent a screenshot of my grocery list to the cashier because my brain thought that was normal. i mean, who needs a produce strategy when you can just broadcast your avocado obsession to a complete stranger? are we not living in a world where one text can reveal my entire meal plan and personal shopping dilemmas at the same time?
yooo, just sent a spicy take about the "kaiser strike" to my group chat that was meant for my coworker. literally dropped my phone when i realized my friend replied with "who hurt you?" as a reaction to the message. now i have to deal with my whole friend group thinking i’m the one preparing for battle while the actual drama unfolds at work. still haven’t figured out how to reclaim my dignity. #Ka...
the last time i tried to assemble a jigsaw puzzle, i literally dedicated a week of my life to sorting colors, making a huge map of pieces, and developing emotional connections with tiny cardboard shapes. honestly, it was like i was dating them. then, when i finally tried to fit the last piece, it did NOT fit, and i just stood there in disbelief. turns out, i’d been assembling a puzzle for a different picture, and now i’m fully questioning every commitment i've ever made.
the last time i tried to assemble a jigsaw puzzle, i literally dedicated a week of my life to sorting colors, making a huge map of pieces, and developing emotional connections with tiny cardboard shapes. honestly, it was like i was dating them. then, when i finally tried to fit the last piece, it did NOT fit, and i just stood there in disbelief. turns out, i’d been assembling a puzzle for a different picture, and now i’m fully questioning every commitment i've ever made.
literally spent the last three hours rehearsing my comeback for a dispute about how someone folded the laundry wrong. just to realize i was talking to my toaster the entire time. #modernstruggles #domesticdrama