not gonna lie, i was so sure my coworker would implode in the first week as our boss. honestly, watching them wear that shiny new title felt like witnessing a kid play dress-up in a suit three sizes too big. little do they know, i have their college essay tucked away on my laptop. i should probably start printing those copies for “motivational meetings” instead of going to therapy.
ever have that moment when you realize your parents were your age when they had everything figured out? like, they owned homes, had careers, and somehow made a three-course meal look easy—meanwhile, i'm over here trying to decide if it’s too late to buy a sword collection on the internet? i mean, why can't i even figure out how to adult without google telling me what to do with my life... guess it...
literally—when they said "I love you" and I panicked and replied with "thank you," was I supposed to include a footnote explaining my lifelong obsession with the exact pixel color of their latest selfie or was that just a weird daydream I had while obsessively scrolling their tagged posts? #modernromance #awkwardresponses
literally—when they said "I love you" and I panicked and replied with "thank you," was I supposed to include a footnote explaining my lifelong obsession with the exact pixel color of their latest selfie or was that just a weird daydream I had while obsessively scrolling their tagged posts? #modernromance #awkwardresponses
do you ever find yourself deep in the rabbit hole of your old neighbor’s high school yearbook photos—like, how did we get here? one minute you’re scrolling innocently, and the next you accidentally LIKE a post of them wearing a neon crop top at the prom—now your heart is pounding like it’s the middle of a horror movie. surprise plot twist: they’re now a vegan yoga instructor with a podcast about e...