it’s not that i don’t see the red flags, it’s just that they feel more like decorations now. how can someone make you feel so small and yet somehow convince you that the view is beautiful? every time i sit on the floor to cry because the couch is too comfortable and might remind me of their warmth, i wonder if this is all there is. is it normal to weigh happiness against the effort of leaving?
saw the news about that explosion in islamabad. it’s all over the headlines, and all i can think about is how some people might wake up tomorrow without loved ones, while here i am, stuck playing video games at three am, avoiding life because my parents expect me to be "the one who achieves something" like Sharma ji ka beta who went to NASA. i laugh at my character’s battles, but they hit harder t...
just realized i have been ghosting my watercolor set for months. every time i sit down to paint, i feel like the only thing i can conjure up is a dark shade of regret mixed with anxiety. turns out staring at a blank canvas is a lot like looking in the mirror during an existential crisis—just me, my brushes, and the haunting realization that all those “what could have been” masterpieces were actually just a splash away from feeling like the messy reality of adulting. who knew art could turn into my least favorite class in high school: regrets 101?
just realized i have been ghosting my watercolor set for months. every time i sit down to paint, i feel like the only thing i can conjure up is a dark shade of regret mixed with anxiety. turns out staring at a blank canvas is a lot like looking in the mirror during an existential crisis—just me, my brushes, and the haunting realization that all those “what could have been” masterpieces were actually just a splash away from feeling like the messy reality of adulting. who knew art could turn into my least favorite class in high school: regrets 101?
no because seeing anthony mosca being all successful while i’m still figuring out how to turn my ramen noodles into actual meals has me questioning my life choices. meanwhile, my cousin is flexing a big salary abroad, and here i am wondering if my love for cramming myself into a tiny corner with a video game console can really pay the bills someday. every time i play, i build these entire worlds b...