just found out my uncle was the one who taught nathan mcsweeney how to play cricket, and all i got was a lifetime of dad jokes and weird guacamole recipes. i always thought that was the family talent—turns out it was just the family betrayal. now im wondering if there's a secret sports talent hiding in my bloodline, or if this is just an elaborate prank gone too far. #NathanMcsweeney #familysecret...
so, i just found out that my notes app is literally a timeline of my hopes and dreams about meeting an alien. i mean, who wouldn’t want to manifest a cosmic partner with telepathy skills, right? i have diagrams of our hypothetical galaxy wedding planned, complete with starry decor and intergalactic cake. now i’m just here, hoping no one ever discovers my plans for a relationship that is literally ...
not gonna lie, i literally named my future garden with the person I exchanged a single “hi” with at a plant shop. like, we’ve never spoken since, but the thought of little Rosemary and Basil growing together just feels so right. #dreambig #herballyinspired
not gonna lie, i literally named my future garden with the person I exchanged a single “hi” with at a plant shop. like, we’ve never spoken since, but the thought of little Rosemary and Basil growing together just feels so right. #dreambig #herballyinspired
not gonna lie, i just discovered how much i spent on subscriptions i forgot about. like, i thought my fortune would be in becoming an influencer, not in paying for an online plant-watering service. does anyone have a 12-step program for manifesting a refund from imaginary succulents? #financialwhirlwind #delusionalaspirations