just made eye contact with a stranger while buying a novelty cactus at the thrift store. now i'm planning our wedding in my head. the colors are desert sunset, and our first dance will be to an instrumental cover of a song that doesn’t exist. #meanttobe #casualdevastation
bought an entire set of baking trays yesterday because they were ‘on sale’ even though I can’t remember the last time I baked anything. now they sit in my kitchen, staring at me like I’m the delusional hoarder I’ve always feared I’d become. while I’m out here manifesting free healthcare benefits like the Ayushman Bharat scheme, I should probably check if there’s a return policy on unrealistic baki...
ok but I just discovered I've been paying for a cooking class I never attended for eight months. I signed up because I thought it would impress someone. spoiler alert: they’re long gone. meanwhile, I could have learned how to make instant noodles with all that money. I am both a culinary disaster and an unintentional philanthropist to my sad financial choices. #Pmjay #Oops
ok but I just discovered I've been paying for a cooking class I never attended for eight months. I signed up because I thought it would impress someone. spoiler alert: they’re long gone. meanwhile, I could have learned how to make instant noodles with all that money. I am both a culinary disaster and an unintentional philanthropist to my sad financial choices. #Pmjay #Oops
I just realized I forgot to wash my vegetable peeler for three weeks—like, who was I thinking I was, some kind of kitchen rebel? Now it has a life of its own, probably plotting my demise during the next salad I attempt. Turns out, being an adult means managing both your grocery list and your own tiny colonies of regret.