no because i just looked in the mirror and somehow my parents were staring back at me, judging my life choices like i’d just served them burnt toast. that new year resolution about treating myself? turns out its just me treating my face with every questionable life decision i made last year, and now i might have to actually talk to them about it. #realization #
it's not that i’m heartbroken over the past, it’s just... last night I found texts from my cousin when he was actually charming. like, he used to text me about astrology and how Mercury being in retrograde was messing with his love life, and now he sends me “ur late with the rent.” am i even getting this right? since when did we exchange big cousin drama for tiny rent drama...
just realized i spent the whole last week on a serious cooking binge—like, i had aspirations to become the next culinary legend but all it did was teach my smoke alarm a new range of shrill tones while my apartment now resembles a 5-star disaster zone. I decided to test my ‘skills’ while binge-watching this super intense reality cooking show about world-class chefs and yeah, spoiler alert, they definitely won’t be calling me for their next season because now im out here in a big hole of burnt spaghetti while the landlord calls about rent. rent's due but my paycheck’s 3 days away and at this rate i’m considering asking Ranveer Singh for his dhurandhar tips just to fund my food’s therapy sessions—because lord knows it needs it after this week! #RanveerSinghDhurandhar #CookingChaos
just realized i spent the whole last week on a serious cooking binge—like, i had aspirations to become the next culinary legend but all it did was teach my smoke alarm a new range of shrill tones while my apartment now resembles a 5-star disaster zone. I decided to test my ‘skills’ while binge-watching this super intense reality cooking show about world-class chefs and yeah, spoiler alert, they definitely won’t be calling me for their next season because now im out here in a big hole of burnt spaghetti while the landlord calls about rent. rent's due but my paycheck’s 3 days away and at this rate i’m considering asking Ranveer Singh for his dhurandhar tips just to fund my food’s therapy sessions—because lord knows it needs it after this week! #RanveerSinghDhurandhar #CookingChaos
i just added up all the money i’ve spent on cooking classes because i thought i’d be the next master chef. turns out, i’m literally just a microwave connoisseur now, and the last dish i made looked like something a raccoon would reject. but hey, at least my bank account is feeling as empty as my fridge.