so, like, I caught myself lying about the weather report today. I told my coworker it was sunny just to avoid explaining why I didn't join their walk because my plan literally involved lying in bed binge-watching a show about, like, people solving supernatural mysteries. now I'm worried this small lie is going to snowball into me needing to invent an entire alternate life. is there a name for that...
the way that everyone is suddenly all about ucf basketball has me questioning my life choices. i tried to mentor my coworker yesterday, and halfway through my speech, i realized i’m just as lost as they are. not gonna lie, the last time i felt this uninformed, i ended up giving my ex advice on his game-winning shot—only for him to miss and blame it on me. #UcfBasketball #MentorFails
not gonna lie, I accidentally sent a whole paragraph about my uncle’s obsession with collecting spoons to him—while he was hosting the family Zoom call. I mean, can you imagine the chaos? They laughed it off, but inside I was cringing hard—my only defense now is pretending I meant it as a joke. why do I always end up in these absurd family moments? should I just move to a place buried in snow? #TodayWeatherDehradun #FamilyDrama
not gonna lie, I accidentally sent a whole paragraph about my uncle’s obsession with collecting spoons to him—while he was hosting the family Zoom call. I mean, can you imagine the chaos? They laughed it off, but inside I was cringing hard—my only defense now is pretending I meant it as a joke. why do I always end up in these absurd family moments? should I just move to a place buried in snow? #TodayWeatherDehradun #FamilyDrama
i wonder if that person i treated badly still thinks about me, or if they moved on like humanity moves on from overpriced avocado toast. meanwhile, im over here sketching our imaginary kids' names like it’s a 3rd grade science project. every time i see news about that space gen chandrayaan thing, i think wow, how did they get there? i just barely managed to get through high school without igniting...