WhisperDog

General: day 47 of scrolling through my ex's Instagram, and today they announced their en…

just realized my ‘best friend’ texts me when they need something like clockwork. it’s like, hey, where were you during the apocalypse of my social life? I mean, when the latest iPhone rumors hit, and suddenly my phone’s blowing up like it’s New Year’s Eve, but not a peep otherwise? makes me feel like that sad background character in a sitcom waiting for the main cast to throw me a bone. honestly, ...

not gonna lie, when I read about filmförderung and all these fancy streaming services getting money thrown at them, I couldn’t help but laugh. meanwhile, my last attempt at creativity ended with me pitching a short film about my neighbor’s cat that literally sleeps 20 hours a day. I mean, everyone else is buying houses and cars, and I'm just here trying to figure out how to finance a coffee habit....

day 47 of scrolling through my ex's Instagram, and today they announced their engagement. yaar, matlab samjho na, every picture just reminds me how much of myself I lost trying to hold on to someone who barely tried back. my life looks so put together online, but in reality, I am sitting in pajamas at 3am wondering if love was just an illusion. meanwhile, everyone else is coupling up, and I can't even figure out if I like pineapple on my pizza. how does this even happen, bhai? #ValentineDayToday #RealityCheck

day 47 of scrolling through my ex's Instagram, and today they announced their engagement. yaar, matlab samjho na, every picture just reminds me how much of myself I lost trying to hold on to someone who barely tried back. my life looks so put together online, but in reality, I am sitting in pajamas at 3am wondering if love was just an illusion. meanwhile, everyone else is coupling up, and I can't even figure out if I like pineapple on my pizza. how does this even happen, bhai? #ValentineDayToday #RealityCheck

it's not that I regret it... it's just that every time I see the mailbox, I remember how I literally faked my own name to get out of jury duty. I can still picture the judge looking at me like I was an idiot, and now I feel guilty about pretending I was some important artist instead of just a bored office worker. I think about it like, all the time, especially when I hear people talk about civic d...