yooo, just sat down to read the latest Google News about them cleaning up bogus headlines. this feels like when I tried to organize my closet and just ended up shoving everything further back. it hit me hard because here I am, drafting 47 versions of a text to my crush—each one feeling more embarrassing than the last—and I send them “ok.” life is basically just an ongoing cycle of trying to keep i...
it’s eleven fifty-eight at night and i just liked a post from forty-seven weeks ago. who even waits that long to post a photo of a half-eaten burrito? now my thumb is a time traveler and i am deeply regretting all my life choices. do i un-like it and risk looking desperate? or do i just wait for my true love to come to my rescue and explain it all to them?
do you ever feel like your childhood snack preferences literally dictated your entire fate? because honestly, my sibling got goldfish crackers and I got plain rice cakes. now they are the family favorite and I’m just here pretending I don't have full conversations with my air fryer about how it’s the only one that truly understands me. #SiblingFavoritism #SnackTrauma
do you ever feel like your childhood snack preferences literally dictated your entire fate? because honestly, my sibling got goldfish crackers and I got plain rice cakes. now they are the family favorite and I’m just here pretending I don't have full conversations with my air fryer about how it’s the only one that truly understands me. #SiblingFavoritism #SnackTrauma
bruh, i just ran into my childhood best friend at the corner store. you know, the one who used to share their lunch with me every day? they looked me dead in the eyes, blinked, and walked right past me like i was a ghost. i mean, we bonded over that weird obsession with collecting Beanie Babies. now they act like they never even knew what a "peanut the royal blue elephant" is. life is truly a trag...