i did the math on how much i spend on novelty socks every year. i mean, we're talking about unicorns, tacos, and even avocados doing yoga. and for what? my feet are warm, but my SOUL is still cold and lonely. turns out, you can’t buy happiness, but you can definitely buy socks that remind you of your terrible choices.
i just realized my so-called best friend only texts me when they need the wifi password—do you ever wonder if they think my router has feelings? like am i just a glorified IT support line for their Netflix binges? but hey, if they keep it up, maybe i’ll charge them an hourly fee—start making this friendship more financially beneficial, you know?
wait, so i read about the whole XLRI career fair and realized, oh wow, my life’s a hilarious rerun of my parents’ script. im just here auditioning for a part i didn’t want. sorry to my coffee table for not giving it the attention it deserves while i stress about making sure my 9 to 5 feels meaningful. i mean, all those degrees and achievements, and deep down, im just hoping they don’t find out im still wondering if maybe a life of exotic plants and meditation in a van would be better. so, you know, thanks, mom and dad for this degree in something that sounds important, while i daydream about running away to become a llama farmer. still haven’t made that leap yet. #Xlri #CareerConfusion
wait, so i read about the whole XLRI career fair and realized, oh wow, my life’s a hilarious rerun of my parents’ script. im just here auditioning for a part i didn’t want. sorry to my coffee table for not giving it the attention it deserves while i stress about making sure my 9 to 5 feels meaningful. i mean, all those degrees and achievements, and deep down, im just hoping they don’t find out im still wondering if maybe a life of exotic plants and meditation in a van would be better. so, you know, thanks, mom and dad for this degree in something that sounds important, while i daydream about running away to become a llama farmer. still haven’t made that leap yet. #Xlri #CareerConfusion
i looked in the mirror this morning and instead of my own reflection, i saw my parents glaring back at me—hair perfectly coiffed and faces oddly youthful, like they just stepped out of an eighties music video. the kicker? they started critiquing my wardrobe like some kind of twisted reality show. just as i contemplated how to escape this bizarre family reunion, my mother pointed at a tiny speck of...