i said i would NEVER be the person who buys a body pillow for emotional support, yet here i am, spooning a giant plush potato at 3 a.m., claiming it's my soulmate. i swear, it has eyes that look deep into my soul, judging every choice i make. what have i become? #justhowitissometimes #selflovewins
i literally had my parents show up unannounced while i was knee-deep in a surprisingly intense emotional support bubble bath. like, candles lit, a lavender playlist that was honestly bringing tears to my eyes. they walk in and the first thing my mom does is knock over the bath bomb i was hoarding for a “special occasion.” now they think i’m trying to find inner peace in a bubble-covered disaster. ...
just calculated how long it would take to save for a life-size cardboard cutout of my favorite celebrity and now I’m just sitting here, questioning if they even deserve my undying loyalty. like do they even know i exist? i have this whole scenario in my head where they find my savings plan and think, wow, what a devoted fan, and then immediately get confused because who saves for this? who SAVES for cardboard?
just calculated how long it would take to save for a life-size cardboard cutout of my favorite celebrity and now I’m just sitting here, questioning if they even deserve my undying loyalty. like do they even know i exist? i have this whole scenario in my head where they find my savings plan and think, wow, what a devoted fan, and then immediately get confused because who saves for this? who SAVES for cardboard?
last night, I was randomly chosen to mentor someone and I literally have no idea what I'm doing. caught myself doodling elaborate maps in a notebook, planning our "journey to success." my plan includes treasure hunts, motivational dance breaks, and snacks, obviously. honestly, what does mentorship even mean? I'm pretty sure I just turned this into an after-school special that nobody asked for.