the way that my "best friend" only texts me when they want my rare spice blend recipe—like i’m not here being their personal culinary encyclopedia. it’s not even a popular one, just a weird concoction from an obscure online forum. i lowkey want to respond with a recipe that takes a hundred years to prepare—completely unusable, just to see them scramble for the ingredients.
honestly, my workload just doubled because half the team got laid off, but now I am seriously reconsidering my life choices. I spent my entire lunch break rehearsing how I would explain this chaos at my own imaginary funeral, dressed in my go-to funeral outfit just in case. if Drake Maye can make the playoffs, I should at least get a medal for surviving corporate absurdity. #Game #LifeIsTheRealGam...
it’s not that i care about elton john’s kneecaps being turned into jewelry. it’s just... i’ve been overthinking whether i should turn my old gym shoes into a scrapbook because they held my tears during those endless treadmill sessions. and now, realizing elton has his old body parts fashionably displayed makes me think i should at least monetize my emotional breakdowns too. where does it end? next thing you know, i’ll be selling my barely-there will to live as art. #EltonJohn #bodyposi
it’s not that i care about elton john’s kneecaps being turned into jewelry. it’s just... i’ve been overthinking whether i should turn my old gym shoes into a scrapbook because they held my tears during those endless treadmill sessions. and now, realizing elton has his old body parts fashionably displayed makes me think i should at least monetize my emotional breakdowns too. where does it end? next thing you know, i’ll be selling my barely-there will to live as art. #EltonJohn #bodyposi
not gonna lie, when i heard about elton john turning his old knees into jewelry, i had a moment. i’m over here just trying to keep my 30-something self together, realizing i’ve been walking around like an old lady after yoga class. meanwhile, elton's strutting with sparkly knees that remind me of the last time i danced like nobody was watching, which was literally yesterday… in my living room, wit...