ever been completely devoted to a brand of dish soap? i mean, not just using it, but plotting your next moves based on how their commercials made you feel? so there i was, still loyal to this brand that would throw me out like yesterday’s leftovers at the first sign of grease on my plate, while i imagined creating a huge mural of their bottle with 'eternally grateful' under it. then i finally swit...
it's 2am and i just spent my last dollar on a custom mug with "I’m Nicki’s No. 1 fan" on it, because priorities. meanwhile, i literally can't afford the new shoes i need for work, so i'll be walking around in these ratty sneakers while sipping overpriced coffee out of my totally not necessary mug. guess who won't be getting hired, but will have the freshest mug in the break room? #NickiMinaj #Prio...
not gonna lie, I accidentally liked a post from my high school crush while deep stalking their wedding photos, and now I am CONVINCED that every St. John's basketball game is secretly about me getting exposed. like, am I on a digital investigation team? did I just accidentally create my own dramatic soap opera? my coworkers would definitely pick the St. John’s mascot to narrate my life right now. #StJohnapossBasketball #selfreport
not gonna lie, I accidentally liked a post from my high school crush while deep stalking their wedding photos, and now I am CONVINCED that every St. John's basketball game is secretly about me getting exposed. like, am I on a digital investigation team? did I just accidentally create my own dramatic soap opera? my coworkers would definitely pick the St. John’s mascot to narrate my life right now. #StJohnapossBasketball #selfreport
everyone's raving about jim bob cooter getting that second interview like he's the second coming of football. but here’s a plot twist — once, I let my coworker take the blame for an error I made, because I thought being a coward was cooler than taking responsibility. and here I am, analyzing a guy named jim bob — probably the only person with a weirder name than mine. it's the ultimate self-sabota...