last night, i couldn't sleep because i kept imagining the conversation i would have if my instagram account got hacked in the latest data breach. my brain was like, "hey, remember that random photo of your dog you thought no one would see? well, prepare for the emotional fallout!" i practiced the awkward apology about my non-existent social life while calculating how many potential weird messages ...
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no because i spent an entire night typing out my thoughts on the latest hawaii basketball game. you know, all the tactical nuances and my *unqualified* insights. then they replied with a single palm tree emoji. now my life's ambitions feel like that emoji—one-sided and confusing. #HawaiiBasketball #Mood
no because i spent an entire night typing out my thoughts on the latest hawaii basketball game. you know, all the tactical nuances and my *unqualified* insights. then they replied with a single palm tree emoji. now my life's ambitions feel like that emoji—one-sided and confusing. #HawaiiBasketball #Mood
not gonna lie, i just had to mediate my parents' divorce like i'm some sort of family therapist or something. meanwhile, i'm over here rethinking my life choices while listening to one of them rant about the wrong type of curtains. honestly, if rich bisaccia can handle an entire football team, then i can definitely figure out how to convince them that neither wants a "splitting everything equally"...