i am sitting in my small apartment, the same one where i dreamt of big promotions and laughter, but now my friends just ask why i never come out to lunch anymore. seeing them go up while my salary is stuck feels like living in slow motion, i can feel the invisible walls closing in and honestly, nobody says anything but it all feels clear as day.
so last week i was talking about my favorite soup at the grocery store and turned to the person next to me to say how much i love it - and realized halfway through that it was a stranger and not my friend and their face just went blank - awkward silence for like 5 seconds and i just walked away slowly thinking about how i should really know better by now.
just saw a post about someone i used to talk to all the time and i literally sat there scrolling through my contacts like why do i have nobody to call, it feels so empty and i thought about sending a text but honestly i know i wouldn’t even know what to say and it’s like all these memories keep hitting me and now they feel like ghosts or something.
just saw a post about someone i used to talk to all the time and i literally sat there scrolling through my contacts like why do i have nobody to call, it feels so empty and i thought about sending a text but honestly i know i wouldn’t even know what to say and it’s like all these memories keep hitting me and now they feel like ghosts or something.
spent 40 minutes getting the energy to walk to the mailbox and then saw my neighbor jogging past me like it was nothing, my eyes watered cause it felt like another reminder that i might never feel that light again. my favorite sweater is piled in the corner collecting dust and everyone acts like its no big deal when i just want to feel normal for once.