just heard that mohammed siraj didn’t make the world cup team. meanwhile, my sibling still owes me money from two years ago. can you imagine getting snubbed in front of the whole world while i’m sitting here... waiting for that “temporary” loan like it’s a postal service lost in the mail? at this point, i’d honestly be better off getting snubbed by a celebrity… but I’m just here like... where’s my...
i said no to watching the latest episode of that series because i thought i had plans—only to find out those plans were my own imaginary dinner with a girl who hasn’t talked to me in months. now i’m sitting alone with a bag of chips while everyone online raves about plot twists i won't understand—sorry to my couch for dragging it into this dramatic mess. #life #
bruh, just checked the news about Alexander Bublik and honestly, like, I am this close to manifesting my destiny of becoming a professional athlete, which is super funny because the only running I do is sprinting to the fridge at 3 AM. meanwhile, my bank account looks like it took a serious hit this weekend, like I owe my cereal money. maybe I should send Bublik my gym schedule or something? either that or I'm signing up for a reality show where I awkwardly attempt tennis with literally zero skill. #AlexanderBublik #LivingTheDream
bruh, just checked the news about Alexander Bublik and honestly, like, I am this close to manifesting my destiny of becoming a professional athlete, which is super funny because the only running I do is sprinting to the fridge at 3 AM. meanwhile, my bank account looks like it took a serious hit this weekend, like I owe my cereal money. maybe I should send Bublik my gym schedule or something? either that or I'm signing up for a reality show where I awkwardly attempt tennis with literally zero skill. #AlexanderBublik #LivingTheDream
it’s 3am and i just realized my side hustle is literally paying my rent. at this rate, i might as well put “professional procrastinator” on my resume and start working on my acceptance speech for “best chaos coordinator.” meanwhile, alcaraz is out here changing his whole team while i'm still figuring out how to coordinate my socks. someone send help. #Alcaraz #chaoslife