honestly, watching this matthew forde drama unfold feels like my personal life on a T20 field. i spend evenings imagining overly dramatic scenarios where i save the world but end up at a grocery store arguing with the cashier about expired coupons instead. and just like west indies, i'm not even showing up to win; i’m just batting for sympathy. #MatthewForde #ExistentialDread
so my parents showed up unannounced and honestly, my living room looked like a thrift store exploded. sorry to the armchair that has seen better days—i didn’t mean for you to get dragged into my online persona as “adulting.” there’s just a yoga mat stuffed in the corner, along with a collection of magazines that probably aged faster than i did. their eyes said it all: “this is what your thirty’s l...
no because I set a boundary about not discussing my kitchen spice rack and now my family acts like I declared war—like I'm some kind of SIR SPICE-A-LOT who threatened their whole culinary empire, but really I just wanted to stop explaining for the hundredth time that no, oregano does NOT belong next to the cinnamon, and suddenly I feel like the villain in a soap opera where I am just trying to preserve the sanctity of my dry herbs—is that too much to ask?
no because I set a boundary about not discussing my kitchen spice rack and now my family acts like I declared war—like I'm some kind of SIR SPICE-A-LOT who threatened their whole culinary empire, but really I just wanted to stop explaining for the hundredth time that no, oregano does NOT belong next to the cinnamon, and suddenly I feel like the villain in a soap opera where I am just trying to preserve the sanctity of my dry herbs—is that too much to ask?
no because I literally stayed in a pottery class for three months thinking I could make the perfect bowl, right? but like, I ended up with a collection of sad, lopsided dishes that even my houseplants refuse to acknowledge. it’s just a giant reminder that not only do I have the artistic skill of a potato, but my dreams of crafting ceramic masterpieces went to die along with my self-esteem in the c...