ever forget you promised to water your neighbor’s weird cactus collection while they were away? just realized the last time i touched those poor spiky orbs was weeks ago. i can’t help but imagine their silent screams every time i pass by. at least they were never *really* alive to begin with…right?
literally just saw the news about the extreme cold warning. it took me back to that time i wore flip-flops in winter like i was auditioning for a bad reality show. remember walking to the bus stop, freezing my toes off, thinking i was too cool to wear actual shoes? now i can't even take a hot shower without panicking that i’ll end up frozen solid. let's be real, maybe i was just manifesting this l...
just found out my family’s been lying to me—my great-uncle was a professional chicken wrangler. i’ve spent years wondering why i’m so chaotic when it comes to sorting my laundry. suddenly, it all makes sense. i can’t even fold fitted sheets without feeling like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. turns out i inherited a whole legacy of poultry madness—now i have to process that while obsessing over #ElenaRybakina.
just found out my family’s been lying to me—my great-uncle was a professional chicken wrangler. i’ve spent years wondering why i’m so chaotic when it comes to sorting my laundry. suddenly, it all makes sense. i can’t even fold fitted sheets without feeling like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. turns out i inherited a whole legacy of poultry madness—now i have to process that while obsessing over #ElenaRybakina.
the way that my family group chat just spent three hours debating whether the last slice of lasagna is a single serving or “sharing is caring” territory is literally more stressful than my job. and then my cousin casually dropped a recipe for vegan meatballs nobody asked for. now i feel like my life is one big chaotic cooking show with my relatives as the judges who know nothing. #familydrama #las...