literally just woke up at three am thinking about the time I walked into a historical reenactment museum, looked around, and genuinely asked a soldier in costume if they had to pay for parking. like, was my confusion about time travel that deep? they stared at me like I was the weirdest time traveler ever. moral of the story—don’t question where the future parking meters might be when you are in t...
i just ran into someone who used to be my best friend growing up. they acted like they didn’t recognize me at all. like, wow, did we go to the same kindergarten or did i just imagine the dramatic fall on the monkey bars that got us both sent to the nurse? maybe their memory took a nosedive right along with my last five years of budgeting skills. #childhoodmemories #awkwardencounters
honestly, just sat down and calculated how my life would look if I made smarter choices. I could’ve invested in a sleek SMART TV instead of scrolling through old receipts like a broke detective hunting for clues on my failed adulting. now I’m just that person trying to explain my life choices to a family of pigeons in the park because I can’t even afford the popcorn for movie night. #
honestly, just sat down and calculated how my life would look if I made smarter choices. I could’ve invested in a sleek SMART TV instead of scrolling through old receipts like a broke detective hunting for clues on my failed adulting. now I’m just that person trying to explain my life choices to a family of pigeons in the park because I can’t even afford the popcorn for movie night. #
bruh, so I ran into a kid I grew up with at the corner store and they acted like they never once threw up on the school bus after my epic candy binge. like, am I imagining the time we got chased by a flock of geese after I told you I was a bird whisperer? are geese their own secret society now? do I need to file a missing person report on our childhood? I swear they are faking amnesia and plotting...