i found out my position was posted on LinkedIn while simultaneously checking the latest highlights of the Barcelona vs Madrid game. that’s not even the worst part— my boss acted like nothing was happening, just casually asking me if I caught the match last night while my whole future hung in the balance. like, is this a final or my career, because the tension is killing me. #BarcaVsMadrid #WorkDra...
so i was literally watching a documentary about crows because my life choices are that exciting. halfway through, i got so emotionally invested in the crows forming a *social structure* that i started googling ways to befriend them. like, seriously, i caught myself envisioning living in the trees, crafting tiny friendship bracelets for my new crow friends, and throwing lavish picnics for their ent...
i had this brilliant idea to write a book about becoming a professional turtle trainer. i spent years crafting the perfect title - "slow and steady wins the heart." fast forward to today, i googled it. someone already published it. it was a CHILDREN'S BOOK. now i am just left with a collection of rubber turtles and a deeply disappointed sense of urgency. guess i will stick to my day job, where at least my talent for avoiding deadlines shines.
i had this brilliant idea to write a book about becoming a professional turtle trainer. i spent years crafting the perfect title - "slow and steady wins the heart." fast forward to today, i googled it. someone already published it. it was a CHILDREN'S BOOK. now i am just left with a collection of rubber turtles and a deeply disappointed sense of urgency. guess i will stick to my day job, where at least my talent for avoiding deadlines shines.
like, I followed the whole “water your plants and watch them thrive” advice and now I literally have a mini jungle in my apartment, but surprise, my emotional stability did not take root. so here I am, drowning in houseplants that are doing better than me and asking my ficus if it can teach me how to photosynthesize feelings. #plantparentproblems #notasuccessstory