WhisperDog

Appreciation: last night, I discovered I got sorted into the "awkward acquaintances" side of m…

I am convinced that the pigeons in my city have formed a covert intelligence agency. I saw one taking notes while perched on a lamp post. Then I found out they are probably relaying messages to my neighbor, who just got a delivery of twenty five pounds of birdseed. If these feathered spies end up exposing my secret love for peanut butter on pancakes, we are going to have a problem.

the way that i am supposed to mentor someone while i still need help deciding what to have for breakfast is BEYOND me. i mean, i can't even pick out a shirt without overthinking the color palette for THREE HOURS. now they’re asking me about career advice while i’m just here pondering if this unseasonably chilly weather in chennai means it’s time for layers or if that’s too much for my minimalist a...

last night, I discovered I got sorted into the "awkward acquaintances" side of my friend group war. they’re all bonding over trauma while I’m over here pretending I don’t still have my barista's drink order memorized. how did I end up rooting for team “we just wave at each other”? is this what adult friendships look like? at least my secret love life is still flourishing in my mind. #friendgroupdrama #lovelost

last night, I discovered I got sorted into the "awkward acquaintances" side of my friend group war. they’re all bonding over trauma while I’m over here pretending I don’t still have my barista's drink order memorized. how did I end up rooting for team “we just wave at each other”? is this what adult friendships look like? at least my secret love life is still flourishing in my mind. #friendgroupdrama #lovelost

not gonna lie, every time my family brings up my ex, who they preferred because he had "such good taste in chips"—like that is the metric we're judging people by now—I panic. I keep imagining a world where my ex is sending them homemade potato chip baskets on their birthdays while I'm over here making the biggest sacrifice of my life… using store-brand snack options. I had this bizarre thought tha...