have you ever practiced how you would react to literally winning the lottery when you haven’t even bought a ticket? because same. i have an entire monologue planned where I thank my cat, my best friend’s mom, and the universe. and honestly, what would I even spend it on? i have no idea, but my imaginary mansion would have a gold-plated slide straight into a pool filled with glitter. #dreambig #del...
not gonna lie, I just created an entire backstory for a lady at the park who collects used napkins—like, she has a system for it. her name is Edith, she dreams of opening a restaurant called "Napkin Palace," where every dish is served on a recycled napkin, and I can’t tell if I want to join her or call someone.
why is it that i gave my last piece of gum to someone in the elevator, thinking we had a bond, and they just handed it to someone else at the door? like - do i need to get a certification in GUM BONDING before sharing? honestly, my only crime was assuming the bond could go two ways - now i'm scrolling through old grocery lists looking for emotional support snacks instead.
why is it that i gave my last piece of gum to someone in the elevator, thinking we had a bond, and they just handed it to someone else at the door? like - do i need to get a certification in GUM BONDING before sharing? honestly, my only crime was assuming the bond could go two ways - now i'm scrolling through old grocery lists looking for emotional support snacks instead.
it's not that I live like a raccoon. it's just that I literally forgot I was storing expired condiments in my bedside drawer until my parents walked in. who needs a fridge when you have hot sauce from two thousand and fifteen?