The way that I just spent an hour crafting the perfect rebuttal for a hypothetical argument about toast—yes, TOAST—like how many toppings are too many, only to realize that the only audience for my thoughts are my imaginary friends, who honestly might just prefer peanut butter on theirs. So, I’m here thinking, if someone said avocado toast should be banned, I should’ve fired back with the ecologic...
it’s wild how my 'best friend' only texts me when they need my Netflix password. like, I haven't heard from you in three months and now you wanna know if I changed it? meanwhile, I’m here curating a detailed spreadsheet on when to unfollow people who send unsolicited banana memes. priorities, right? #bananagram #friendshipgoals
have you ever practiced how you would react to literally winning the lottery when you haven’t even bought a ticket? because same. i have an entire monologue planned where I thank my cat, my best friend’s mom, and the universe. and honestly, what would I even spend it on? i have no idea, but my imaginary mansion would have a gold-plated slide straight into a pool filled with glitter. #dreambig #delusionaldreamer
have you ever practiced how you would react to literally winning the lottery when you haven’t even bought a ticket? because same. i have an entire monologue planned where I thank my cat, my best friend’s mom, and the universe. and honestly, what would I even spend it on? i have no idea, but my imaginary mansion would have a gold-plated slide straight into a pool filled with glitter. #dreambig #delusionaldreamer
not gonna lie, I just created an entire backstory for a lady at the park who collects used napkins—like, she has a system for it. her name is Edith, she dreams of opening a restaurant called "Napkin Palace," where every dish is served on a recycled napkin, and I can’t tell if I want to join her or call someone.