have you ever wondered if you’re just the extra credit assignment that everyone else hopes gets a big red "F"? because sometimes I think they put on their polite faces while secretly wishing I’d just fade into the wallpaper, right next to the overly enthusiastic motivational posters no one takes seriously — because that might mean I actually show up at another "team bonding" exercise while they de...
i just found out kansas lawmakers want to eliminate yearly vehicle renewals. listen, this hits hard because last week, i almost failed the driving test… at a DMV that was half a block from my house. imagine failing a driving test, making awkward eye contact with the instructor, and then promptly driving my ancient car back home, knowing it may not even be legal anymore. so, like, eliminating vehic...
the way that everyone's hyped about barca's win, it’s like a painful reminder of my own awkwardness in sports. like, imagine your whole family thinking you’ll become a doctor when you can’t even watch medical dramas without fainting at blood. basically, while i’m just trying to figure out if my culinary skills can impress anyone, everyone else is living out these epic footy dreams. still waiting for my call from a culinary school, but at this point, i might just whip up biryani for barca’s next game instead of saving lives. who knows, maybe cooking will be my only chance at achieving the dramatic greatness they expect of me. #Fcb #cookingadventures
the way that everyone's hyped about barca's win, it’s like a painful reminder of my own awkwardness in sports. like, imagine your whole family thinking you’ll become a doctor when you can’t even watch medical dramas without fainting at blood. basically, while i’m just trying to figure out if my culinary skills can impress anyone, everyone else is living out these epic footy dreams. still waiting for my call from a culinary school, but at this point, i might just whip up biryani for barca’s next game instead of saving lives. who knows, maybe cooking will be my only chance at achieving the dramatic greatness they expect of me. #Fcb #cookingadventures
literally, I walked into a coffee shop and saw the barista was my old crush who thought I was cool, like a few years ago. honestly, I’m not even over that yet. now, he’s dating this lovely person, and I just KNOW their future kids’ names would be perfect for my imaginary children I named after him, who will NEVER exist. so, do I tell him I saw them? or keep my bizarre crush and ridiculous plans fo...