honestly, my coworker forwarded my private message to the entire team like it was the new hot gossip, but the message was me trying to remember if elena rybakina actually won that match or if I was just dreaming while battling a half-caf cold brew in a boring meeting. now everyone’s acting like I’m the sports expert when I can’t even remember the last time I kept score without Googling it, and my ...
last night, I found myself apologizing to a plant because I forgot to water it for three weeks—like, I had the audacity to take up SPACE in its life. honestly, why am I practicing acceptance speeches for imaginary awards in the mirror while my poor fern is just trying to photosynthesize? it's a betrayal—I’m betraying myself to make sure everything else around me feels GOOD. who knew my greatest co...
last night, my family found my social media and it was, like, literally a disaster. i had to explain why I spent two hours watching live streams of a guy fixing old toasters, and honestly, it’s hard to convey the thrill of toaster restoration to people who still think 'Facebook' is cutting edge. then they started questioning my fascination with a TikTok chef who makes ramen in a slow cooker, as if...