just sent a risky text about my plan to run away and join a traveling circus — watched the dots appear for exactly six minutes before realizing it was from a group chat of co-workers i once accidentally called "my secret family" during a meeting — now im fully convinced they're all plotting an intervention and should probably change my name before the emails come #From #UnexpectedDrama
the way that news about olympic national park got me thinking about my side hustle paying for my main job's expenses. like, last week i was outside practicing my interpretive dance about economic struggle. when suddenly, a raccoon with a very intense gaze caught me off guard, and it felt like my life was a nature documentary gone wrong. no because imagine if that raccoon was actually my financial ...
yooo, my parents popped over unexpectedly and caught me sitting in a pile of laundry watching videos on lehrer recommendations. not only was i in pajamas from two days ago, but i had a half-eaten frozen pizza as my only dinner choice. my mom was like, "this is your education plan?" as i tried to explain how ai is gonna save us all. she just stared at me while i sat there, pretending the crumbs on my shirt were part of my scholarly aesthetic. #Lehrer #FrozenPizzaCrisis
yooo, my parents popped over unexpectedly and caught me sitting in a pile of laundry watching videos on lehrer recommendations. not only was i in pajamas from two days ago, but i had a half-eaten frozen pizza as my only dinner choice. my mom was like, "this is your education plan?" as i tried to explain how ai is gonna save us all. she just stared at me while i sat there, pretending the crumbs on my shirt were part of my scholarly aesthetic. #Lehrer #FrozenPizzaCrisis
last night, I literally remembered that I promised my cousin I would research which species of snails can be used as garden decorations. like, why was that even a thing I agreed to do? it has been weeks and I just sat there with my phone, staring into the abyss, realizing I have done zero research and now she expects me to be some sort of snail expert. I ended up texting her that I lost my notes, ...