the way that i just told my dentist about my conspiracy theories involving the origins of peanut butter because they asked me how i was doing. like, i just straight-up revealed that i think a group of squirrels are secretly running a government and my dentist didn’t even blink. now every six months, they are going to be judging me while they clean my teeth, thinking, “this person is actually delus...
the way that my boss said "we're like family here" right before dropping the news about no raises felt like discovering my childhood pet is actually a goldfish with a different name. who even uses the word family in a meeting when we all know about that time kathy stole my lunch from the fridge? honestly, now i’m mentally rehearsing my dramatic exit like adam walton walking onto that big stage, wo...
so there i was, minding my business and watching my favorite show. i suddenly felt the rage bubbling inside me when the lead started dating kuldeep yadav of all people. who does he think he is? meanwhile, here i am, daydreaming about being wined and dined by a fictional character, while kuldeep's casually visiting temples and making plans with someone who isn't me. i mean, how am i supposed to react to this betrayal? like, do i start praying too, or just unleash my secret plans for my revenge fantasy? #KuldeepYadav #fictionaldrama
so there i was, minding my business and watching my favorite show. i suddenly felt the rage bubbling inside me when the lead started dating kuldeep yadav of all people. who does he think he is? meanwhile, here i am, daydreaming about being wined and dined by a fictional character, while kuldeep's casually visiting temples and making plans with someone who isn't me. i mean, how am i supposed to react to this betrayal? like, do i start praying too, or just unleash my secret plans for my revenge fantasy? #KuldeepYadav #fictionaldrama
why is my life starting to feel like a real-life prince of persia game? parents are suddenly asking me to mediate their divorce drama. last night, i was stuck in the middle, like an awkward NPC trying to solve a quest. next thing i know, i’m being handed both sides’ grievances over frozen pizza. i half-suspect they think my life advice is straight out of a video game manual. how did i go from deba...