i literally argued with someone in my head for three days. when i finally saw them, i was all ready to throw hands like i was in a john wick movie. instead, i just awkwardly said hello and walked away. now i'm just mad at them for no reason. life is truly a tragic comedy. #JohnWick #awkwardmoments
not gonna lie, i literally passed up an opportunity to sell my old collection of collectible spoons because i thought it was a joke, and now silver prices are shooting up. like, those spoons could’ve funded a month of ramen. instead, they’re sitting in my kitchen, judging me every time i make instant noodles. guess im going to be living off of a spoon collection while everyone else invests in silv...
so i just realized my life is basically a weird commercial for low-budget adulthood. i was trying to sound cool about my cooking skills but somehow texted my mom about the “spicy mess” i created with quinoa, soy sauce, and what i thought was peanut butter, but was actually expired mustard. my private story about finally making something healthy got screenshotted by my cousin, and now she probably thinks i'm on the edge of a culinary breakdown. plot twist, she sends me recipes as if i could even read a cookbook without feeling like i need a therapy session.
so i just realized my life is basically a weird commercial for low-budget adulthood. i was trying to sound cool about my cooking skills but somehow texted my mom about the “spicy mess” i created with quinoa, soy sauce, and what i thought was peanut butter, but was actually expired mustard. my private story about finally making something healthy got screenshotted by my cousin, and now she probably thinks i'm on the edge of a culinary breakdown. plot twist, she sends me recipes as if i could even read a cookbook without feeling like i need a therapy session.
the way that i said no to a photoshoot for work because i was having a bad hair day— only to discover that it was actually for the company's social media rebranding. so now my boss is using stock images of fluffy llamas for our Instagram page, and i am currently curating a spreadsheet of EVERYONE’s worst hair days from our Zoom calls. one of those images is going viral— and not for the reasons we ...