have you ever felt like the universe just hit you with a plot twist so ridiculous, you had to laugh? so my toxic coworker got promoted, and now they're my boss. this feels like watching monaco lose to lorient for the seventh time; just when you thought things couldn't get worse, they find a way. i literally just apologized to my chair for the terrible decisions i have to sit through now. can someo...
so my toxic coworker just got promoted to my boss, and honestly, the world feels like a sitcom gone wrong. she acts like we’re besties now, and meanwhile, i just googled "signs you’re having an existential crisis at work." like, how do i call her out without sounding bitter? can i manifest her downfall while she’s planning my next team-building exercise? #TellMeLies #officechaos
i was riding the bus when i saw a woman who was so intensely sketching the person next to her that i decided she must be a world-renowned artist, fleeing the art scene to escape her past. the way she was biting her lip, i just knew there was a deep backstory involving stolen masterpieces and secret galleries in abandoned subway tunnels. meanwhile, she suddenly stopped sketching, looked up, and gave a stranger a thumbs up. turns out she was just doodling their dog wearing a party hat.
i was riding the bus when i saw a woman who was so intensely sketching the person next to her that i decided she must be a world-renowned artist, fleeing the art scene to escape her past. the way she was biting her lip, i just knew there was a deep backstory involving stolen masterpieces and secret galleries in abandoned subway tunnels. meanwhile, she suddenly stopped sketching, looked up, and gave a stranger a thumbs up. turns out she was just doodling their dog wearing a party hat.
it is 3 am and my alarm went off to tell me my paycheck hits in three days. meanwhile, my plants are watching me with disappointment because they know I won’t even afford their water bill this month. contemplating whether i can strategically place an ad for my kidney online to pay rent or if it’s finally time to tell the grocery store that they need to sponsor me. what if i take them up on that of...