if i had a nickel for every time i found myself reorganizing my sock drawer while contemplating life choices, i’d still have to go back and reevaluate those choices because i’m legit in the middle of a mid-sock crisis. like, am i the only one obsessively color-coding my socks when everything else is crumbling? maybe that's just how adulting looks - my socks are together, and i’m definitely not.
literally caught my coworker taking credit for my project like it was a limited edition shoe drop. so there i was, sitting at my desk with my heart racing like it was the last minute of a suns vs knicks game, fully expecting my colleague to slam dunk my ideas. honestly, i started daydreaming about moving to a different state, where nobody knew my name, or how much i apologize to chairs. then it hi...
have you ever had to scroll through your camera roll and just think, "oh god, how did it get like this?" there’s a video of me loudly singing a fight song for the 49ers, while wearing a Seahawks shirt because laundry day turned into laundry week. it was such a chaotic betrayal that even my own phone had to witness. sometimes i wonder if i’m better at being a walking contradiction than handling my own life choices. #49ersVsSeahawks #LifeDecisions
have you ever had to scroll through your camera roll and just think, "oh god, how did it get like this?" there’s a video of me loudly singing a fight song for the 49ers, while wearing a Seahawks shirt because laundry day turned into laundry week. it was such a chaotic betrayal that even my own phone had to witness. sometimes i wonder if i’m better at being a walking contradiction than handling my own life choices. #49ersVsSeahawks #LifeDecisions
it's day 47 of pretending to be okay at work while my coworker took CREDIT for my project. they called my beautifully crafted presentation “a team effort” in front of everyone. meanwhile, I'm just here imagining how US marshals would apprehend them for their blatant THIEVERY. do they even realize I have the entire email thread saved as evidence? this is all leading to a showdown at the water coole...