literally, I cheated on a life-changing test in the worst way possible — had the answers saved in my notes like it was a cheat code for life. fast forward, I’m scrolling through "GMA Deals and Steals" about winter wellness while hiding my secret, wondering if all these comfort deals can help with the existential dread I’m now living. if anyone knew how my whole future rode on a couple of blurry sc...
lmao, so I got into a literal Twitter beef with a fan account that’s devoted to a celebrity’s cousin nobody even knows, and I’ve got a black dress ready for their inevitable funeral when I reveal I found their cousin's middle school yearbook photo where they had an unfortunate haircut. like, nobody asked for this level of chaos but here we are.
literally just found out my toxic coworker got promoted and now they're my boss - like, who decided that? every time I see them at their new desk with a fancy title, I feel like I need a break-up speech. I mean, “it’s not you, it’s me - actually, it is you, you're a nightmare." now I have to explain my productivity report to someone who thought jio star meant their four-month-old Netflix password - how am I even still here? #JioStar #WorkplaceWoes
literally just found out my toxic coworker got promoted and now they're my boss - like, who decided that? every time I see them at their new desk with a fancy title, I feel like I need a break-up speech. I mean, “it’s not you, it’s me - actually, it is you, you're a nightmare." now I have to explain my productivity report to someone who thought jio star meant their four-month-old Netflix password - how am I even still here? #JioStar #WorkplaceWoes
bruh, I keep people at a distance because, like, everyone who got close eventually left, right? It’s like I have this hidden superpower that repels humans… but only the good ones, I think… maybe they just didn’t get my *vibe*? *sighs* Anyway, I started wearing socks with sandals to test the waters, and now no one sticks around long enough to find out my favorite pizza topping. It’s the ultimate st...