not gonna lie, when my parents showed up unannounced, I had a moment where I thought, "why do I have two full garbage bags in the living room?" then I panicked and tried to hide them behind my collection of vintage napkin holders I absolutely do not need. like, they should have seen my fancy funeral outfit in the closet, not this *mess*, I should have made a banner that said "welcome to my unhinge...
i just found out about that whole trade deal thing and let me tell you - i panicked a little, not because of tariffs or whatever, but because i’ve been pretending to know about international relations since my friends tried to get me to pick a favorite diplomat and i casually went with ‘uh, the one with nice glasses.’ now here i am, two margaritas deep at brunch, feeling like the world's worst adu...
I just caught myself sitting on the floor in my closet, whispering sweet nothings to my vintage dress collection like they are my long-lost friends. I’ve been complimenting the floral one on how it would definitely look cute at brunch, even though we both know my last brunch invitation got canceled for a good reason. Now I’m over here, rehearsing a heartfelt apology to my favorite jumpsuit because I’m pretty sure it has feelings. You can only get ghosted by clothes so many times before you start wondering if they know about your online shopping habits.
I just caught myself sitting on the floor in my closet, whispering sweet nothings to my vintage dress collection like they are my long-lost friends. I’ve been complimenting the floral one on how it would definitely look cute at brunch, even though we both know my last brunch invitation got canceled for a good reason. Now I’m over here, rehearsing a heartfelt apology to my favorite jumpsuit because I’m pretty sure it has feelings. You can only get ghosted by clothes so many times before you start wondering if they know about your online shopping habits.
it's not that i care too much, it's just that i overheard the friend i always defended calling me a “theater kid” in a very non-theater way to a complete stranger at the supermarket. like, excuse me, my one-man performance of melodrama during snack runs is pure ART. now i’m just left hanging, trying to figure out if i should confront them or join a dramatic arts class to find my outlet. #plottwist...